July 2006

The Secret


I was referred to a website which proclaimed to have "The Secret" to happiness, prosperity, joy, peace and success. In order to get this "secret," you needed to pay $4.95 and have 2 hours available to watch a film which promised to inspire and enlighten you; change your life. I wanted to find out a little more about what the general idea was for this so-called secret since I thought I might already be privy and didn't want to invest needless time and money into something which I already was on to. I found reference to the fact that this secret was based on the law of attraction and using powerful intentions to get what you want out of life. Well, if that is the secret, I am already keenly aware. Let me share my secret with you now -- for free.


It is a common misconception that "opposites attract." Yes, the initial draw to someone who is diametrically opposed to oneself is the fascination with a world unlike your own. However, how can you enjoy being around someone who is so different from yourself? The fascination wears off and the differences become annoying obstacles to intimacy and harmony. It doesn't even make sense that you would want to subject yourself to being around someone who is opposed to your own comforts, likes and beliefs. Rather, it makes much more sense that you would want to be around someone who shares your core values, beliefs, dreams, and ideas. The concept of like attracting like means that we will attract to ourselves that which we emanate. If we are bitter, we attract bitterness. If we are angry, we attract anger. If we are kind and generous, we attract kindness and generosity. The "secret" to getting what we want out of life is to become that which we desire.


When it comes to relationships, we must become the person who we want to be with. After all, how can expect someone else to be attracted to us when we don't even like ourselves? This requires a bit of self-reflection, taking an inventory of our strengths and weakness and identifying the key areas that we wish to enhance or abolish. Like any healthy change, this will require dedication; a daily commitment to reach our goals. Before we can even begin to love someone else, we must first love ourselves. It is when we feel complete in ourselves, not needy or desperate, that we are most able to find and attract quality companions into our lives. Finding our elusive soulmate begins with finding ourselves.


For other matters in our life, such as finances, career, health and family, the most important means of achieving success is to believe in our ability to attain success. The power of thoughts and words is profound. We must be careful in not making or thinking negatively since these intentions, whether done consciously or unconsciously, can be very influential in obtaining (or falling short of) our goals. It is important to tame our words in order to nurture our aspirations. A daily mantra or prayer works well to make our intentions known to the universe and bring them to fruition. When we say things like "I hate my job" we are only reinforcing the idea of how much we hate our job. We need to be grateful for all the things in our lives that are good and try not to take things for granted, such as: good health, our home, friends, family, etc. Instead of voicing our displeasure, it is important to find the good in all things. For example, instead of stating how much we dislike our job, we should voice gratitude that we have a job at all! Reciting positive affirmations and voicing our goals in a confident manner (rather than a wishful, unobtainable manner) will help draw them to us. Using such phrases as "I am successful" or "I will be successful" rather than "I want to be successful" or "I wish I were successful" gives our dreams a voice. It is important for that voice to speak clearly, positively and assuredly to the Creator who puts those intentions in motion and gives our ambitions wings.


Another facet of finding happiness is to realize that we are the ones who are solely responsible for how we respond to our environment. If we believe that someone "makes us angry," we are believing that someone has the power to control our emotions and reactions. In fact, we make a choice to respond in anger or instead, with a calm demeanor. We needn't reply to anger with anger. We also must not blame others for our own emotions and responses. It is important to claim ownership and take responsibility of our means of reacting with the universe around us.


While it's not always easy to put these practices into effect, it certainly does help to at least have a mental grasp of the concepts. Having the tools to find contentment in one's life will offer the empowerment needed to find hope in what appear to be hopeless situations. Also, knowing that this life is but a momentary passage in our soul's growth can give further optimism and insight into the struggles we face daily.


I don't know how close my "secret" is to the one I could have spent 2 hours and five bucks on to find out, but these convictions are just too good for me to keep secret and I'm happy to share them with you for free.




© 2006 Jennifer N. Ayers. All Rights Reserved.


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